We like to PARTY!

Five years ago I made a decision.  In retrospect, I was not in a rational state and should not have been given the sole ability to make such an important decision.  I was pregnant...in my third trimester.  I was huge...I was tired...I was irritable...and primarily, I was impatient.

I was expecting baby #5, our Miss Lucy.  Three of my other babies had been C-sections, so this was the established process now for how my littles entered the world.  Miss Lucy was due April 6, so my doctor informed me that I could choose my delivery date.  April 1-6 were open to me and I was told to pick!

Big deal, right?  Just look at your calendar and pick a day, you're probably thinking.  Well, here's the fun part.  My husband's birthday is April 2...AND Elsie, my second oldest daughter's birthday is April 4.  So which day would you choose?  What would be the wisest decision?  Well, I was an over eager preggers woman and I chose April 3.

All in a row!  Sounds like a great idea, right!?

Wrong.

Okay, okay, I know... technically this isn't a question of right or wrong, but maybe more just an issue of foolishness.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  Looking back I think her birth will forever be the easiest that those three crazy days will ever be played out... well, at least until my April birthday girls are grown and no longer live at home.

You see,  I knew Lucy's birth day was covered.  No cake required, I just had to survive another c-section and get her into the world!  And Elsie was thrilled to get to celebrate in a hospital with a new baby sister as a present!  Genius!  Now for Jeremy, my husband, I wanted to make sure he didn't feel skimped on...the day before his fifth child was to be born, as if five cuties isn't an awesome gift....hahahah. So I threw him a surprise birthday party too, of course!  :)

It was perfect and AMAZING!  Best three days ever.

But when Lucy's first birthday rolled around the next year...it hit me like a pie to the face. How am I going to make three of the most precious people in the world feel special and celebrated three days in a row!?  How can I stay peppy and smiling when I like life to be low-key?!  Can I ingest that much sugar and survive?   Can I survive my children when THEY ingest that much sugar day after day?!

Well, needless to say, as we mamas do... I've made it work!  But man, I really wish I had picked the 6th of April instead.  That would have made A LOT more sense.  oy.  

But THIS YEAR tops it all....

Maybe you've already calculated the days in your head and you've realized that Easter is on the 1st of April this year.  :)

So we are about to PARTY HARD for four days in a row!  WHOOO!

You know, it's going to be pretty busy and crazy.  Especially since my husband is a pastor and Easter is a big deal to us on so many levels.  But I'm so excited.  Having Easter precede the three birthdays kinda put it all into perspective for me this year.

What a privilege.  All of it.  We have SO MUCH to celebrate.

As it says in Romans 8:11..."And if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead lives in you, then He who raised Christ from the dead will also bring your mortal bodies to life through His Spirit who lives in you."

Because of Christ's death and resurrection, the same power that raised Christ from the dead now lives in me!  I have victory over sin.  I have strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow.  I have real JOY!  Three birthdays in a row got nothin' on me :)  Bring it!

So here's my prayer for you...

"I pray that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, would give you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him.  I pray that the perception of your mind may be enlightened so you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the glorious riches of His inheritance among the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of His POWER to us who believe, according to the working of His vast strength." (Ephesians 1:17-19)   I pray that you would have ridiculous joy this weekend and that you would feel his strength, giving you the confidence to tackle whatever the week after holds.  

 Blessings,

Free Printable Stickers to Cheer You!

Hi friends :)
Happy New Year!  (a bit...a lot...late!)  How's 2017 treating you?

I feel rather blah.  I already feel discouraged about the goals and changes I had hoped to make in the new year.  It's been gloomy, rainy, and blah around here.  Usually I enjoy the quiet of winter...the need to cozy up with tea...the shorter days and the slower pace of life.

But,
I feel like I'm stuck in a funk....like the standard rhythm of life is pulling me down and not allowing me to break into new rhythms.

Within that train of thought, it occurred to me the other day that this is the longest I've been in a consistent place in life. Up until now there have been significant changes every year or so.
First marriage,
then a baby,
a move,
a job change,
a new house,
a baby,
a move,
a job change,
a new house,
a baby,
a call into ministry,
a move,
a new house,
a baby,
a new house,
a job change,
a baby.....................................................................................................

And now almost four years later,  I've found myself in a place that is entirely strange.  Nothing new.  I always said that I wanted to settle in some where.  And I still feel that on one side of my brain.  But I'm realizing how comfortable I am with change.  In fact, how much I enjoy change!  I love new houses, I love new challenges, and I LOVE new babies.  So here I sit in a house I love, a town I love, a church I love, with growing kids (that I adore!) ... and I'm feeling stuck.

What do I do with that?

What can I do but seek the Author and Finisher, my Creator and all powerful loving Father... He sees where I am.... in this GOOD, but challenging place.  And I WAIT...  for His direction, for His plans, for His peace and joy.

But it's still hard...especially because I'm impatient :)

When I realized that this was the first time in our marriage that we'd gone so long without any significant change,  I wanted to take things into my own hands....  So I told Jeremy maybe we should get my tubes untied and have another baby.

you should have seen. his. face.  :)  haha

He said no.

So we compromised and decided we'll paint a room.

:)

But in the midst of all this "lack of change,"  I'm increasingly grateful for my little creative business.  It gives me something to develop ( along with those 5 squirrely kiddos of mine).  I always have some new goal, ambition, or project that I'm working towards.  And this is most certainly a wonderful gift from God.

So I created this happy little set of Care Bear stickers the other day... for me...and for you!!  I used them in my planner, but you could use them for anything!  They make me smile and think of my childhood :)

So enjoy!  Maybe they will cheer you just a bit...in whatever place of life you find yourself :)

Simply print on sticker paper (I like Avery full sheet labels), cut, and stick wherever!

DOWNLOAD PDF

or 

Click on the high resolution JPEG below and save to your computer.

Blessings!

Free Printable Merry Mail Stickers!...and a dose of honesty.

So does it irk you that I'm posting Christmas stuff already? Or does it get you excited? I hope it makes you feel all giddy inside, but I'm very well aware of the fact that it might make you feel overwhelmed and behind before you've even begun. 

Here's how I know:  5 years ago, I felt nothing but disdain for the Christmas season.  That sounds horrible, I know, but it's true.  In fact, the awareness that I was supposed to love Christmas, especially as a follower of Christ, only served as added fuel to the emotional disaster that the season was for me.   

At that point in my life, I had a grumpy 9 month old and 3 young girls. I was chin deep in toys, laundry, stress, sleeplessness, freelance design work, and homeschooling.  I routinely went through cycles of moderate depression and intense physical fatigue.  So from this place, all I could see were the added responsibilities and expectations of the Christmas season.  I remember talking with a mentor of mine and guiltily admitting that I dreaded this time of year.  She asked how she could help and I found myself gushing a desperate plea to be relieved of having to make Christmas cut-out cookies with my girls.  This was one of the things they were looking forward to the most and the very thought of the mess and chaos it would bring nearly triggered a panic attack in me.  She just smiled and said why don't you let the girls come over here and make cookies this year.  

It seems funny now :)  But that's just where I was at... everything overwhelmed me.  

That stage lasted for a few years. Then last year as the end of October rolled around I realized that I was actually looking forward to the upcoming holiday season!  As if I was suddenly freed from a dreadful curse, I felt light and happy anticipating all that Christmas would bring.  My stage of life had shifted and the heaviness of that season was no longer so oppressive.  

So if any piece of that resembles how you feel going into this Christmas season, I'm sorry...I remember the feeling so well and hurt with you.  Or maybe it runs even deeper for you.  Maybe you're experiencing loss or deep pain and Christmas is only going to intensify the reality of this.  Whether your situation is quite mild or all consuming, the answers are still the same.  

Find someone to confide in and to help bear the weight of where you're at.  And if you don't have anyone, email me! We were never meant to do this life alone.  The enemy of our souls wants to isolate us.  He wants to mess with your mind and make your think things are hopeless.  But in Christ, and in the fellowship of believers we are never alone and we always have hope.  

And most importantly, if you have to let everything else go... cling tightly to one thing.  Spend time each day in God's word and in prayer.  It doesn't have to be a lot, but pursue the only thing that has power to bring you out of darkness and into light and freedom.  It doesn't mean that as soon as you open up your Bible, everything will change.  But as you seek to know Christ more in this way, it will give you strength to endure and you'll find comfort from his presence.  After all, that's what Christmas is celebrating... Jesus coming near... so we could know Him and find life in Him.  Nothing else really matters.  Not even Christmas cut-out cookies :)

"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Matthew 6:33

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:13

"Let us strive to know the Lord. His appearance is as sure as the dawn. He will come to us like the rain, like the spring showers that water the land." Hosea 6:3

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

So if it doesn't overwhelm you, :) .....and if it helps you get excited for this season of our Savior coming near...  I have these printable Merry Mail sticker for you! 

You can download a PDF of the stickers through Google Drive HERE

Or you can save the high resolution Jpeg file below...

Just print on sticker paper (I like Avery full sheet labels) and cut with a scissor... or if you have a Silhouette or other cutting device, just pop the jpeg into the design program to make your own kiss-cut stickers!  fun. fun. :)

Blessing to you!

Sharing Pieces of Life... over a cup of coffee, with you :)

Over the past four plus years, I formed the pages and the images of this blog.  I poured out my heart as I talked about pains and struggles.  I labored over the story of the Twins, in hopes that it would encourage you.  I played show and tell letting your see my creative side. And I filled the cracks with free goodies hoping you'd continue to come back :)  But the stages of life press on, and these days I don't always have the time or energy to share with you.  This frustrates me especially on certain days when I'm bursting with something I'd love to share, but can't find the time.... But it is what it is.  Right?

But for this moment, I'm here!  And I'd love to share a bit of "the life of Amy J." with you, haha ;)
And because there is SO MUCH that I could share... really folks, I have a full and crazy life, with much that would probably amuse you or maybe inspire, I hope... (I'm rambling already!)... but I will catch you up on the three most significant portions of my life, in no particular order.

My Home and Family....
What can I tell you?  I'm a mama to five, you can fill in most of the blanks :)  Do you remember back when V was a toddler?  Do you remember how strung out I was because he was such a handful?  Well... double that.  He is STILL a big handful.  Oh, that Virgil (3 yrs now)... I love him, love him, love him... but he is always DOING something (boys, right??)... he's punching, he's kicking, he climbing in fridge, in the closet, digging around in the garage for tools, running around in the neighbors yard and inviting himself in for muffins. yeesh.  But then he'll come and find me, curl up on my lap and as I nuzzle his ear he whispers,  "I wuv you mommy."  Then everything else just doesn't matter.

AND... then there's Lucy (1.5 yrs).  I truly have come to believe that God gave me Lucy to humble me and make me desperate for him... haha... no joke.  She IS that girl with the curl in the middle of her forehead!  When she's sweet, oh my she's adorable, yes, curls and all!  But mercy when she's mad... and she's mad most of the time... just brace yourself.  For example, we drove to California this summer for a vacation...  25 hours in the car, one way.  Lucy intermittently cried, whined, screamed about 20 of those hours.  seriously.  All of my disciplining strategies are being tested and refined here with #5.  And my prayer life has jumped up several notches, just let me say!

The three big girls (10, 7.5, almost 6 yrs), as we call them... I have no complaints, in comparison :)  They each have more hair that a full grown adult should have... I'm talking crazy amounts of hair.  It's beautiful. They are beautiful... and they are growing up waaaaaay too fast.

My Creative Side...
You know since the explosion of Pinterest, blogs, Instagram and the like, I feel like I'm almost always on creative overload.  I love it, but I hate it.  I loooooove looking at pretty things and getting inspired.  But after awhile, I feel like I'm going to burst.  Like I just HAVE to let some of it out!  I make lists upon lists of all the ideas that come to my mind, triggered by who knows what all that I've seen out there.  But since life is busy and other things take priority, then I'm left over-stuffed with unexpressed creativity!  AHHHHH!  So eventually when I find a chunk of time to indulge...then I go on massive designing, drawing, or decorating sprees.  It's good :)  You can see the results of the drawing sprees here :)

My Faith...
If you haven't read my About page, then maybe you don't know about my faith... and perhaps this is my greatest mistake over the last months.  I wish I could share with you my heart more often in this area.  This is my everything.  I am nothing, lost, dead, defeated, empty, futile... if not for Jesus Christ my Savior.  Just had to say that first off...  :) :)

This stage of life for me is hard.  (I will direct you back to my comments about Lucy.. haha ) Yet it is so good.  I have struggled for a long time with a desperate need to be in control of things...and by things I mean MY things.  I won't boss you around, I won't argue with you... but I do want my home in order.  I do want my children to mind.  I want peace and tranquility in my home. I want to get myself together as well.  Be the mom, wife, believer that I should be... blah, blah, blah.  It has become an idol or sorts, I suppose.  So God is breaking me down... piece by piece, struggle by struggle, child by child :)  And I guess there must be a lot of pressure to finish up the work on me, since Lucy is our last!

I am learning to let life be a mess.... in so many ways.  It's not that I'm giving into messy floors and piles of laundry.  I'm just embracing this life for what it is.  It's not heaven.  It's a broken place filled with broken people, including me.  I'm letting go of longing for the perfection... realize it only can be found in Christ.

I love this quote from C.S. Lewis:

“The great thing, if one can, is to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions of one's 'own,' or 'real' life. The truth is of course that what one calls the interruptions are precisely one's real life -- the life God is sending one day by day.”

And I've come to the realization, that if all these daily struggles... these interruptions, whatever they may be... keep me desiring him and his perfection, then it's okay.  In fact, it's necessary.  So I'm learning to start the day by saying, "Okay, God.  Have your way.  Whatever it is that you have for me today, help me to fall in step... to not fight or complain... Do a good work in me.  Teach me. Keep me desperate for you. And let your Holy Spirit consume me so that I am able..."

So that's that... phew!  It felt good to catch up!  If we were sitting over coffee,  this would be the point where you share how you're doing!  ... How's your family?  What are you creating lately?  What's God been teaching you?    So comment, if you'd like and let me know!  Or you can always email too... I'll respond I promise ;)

Blessings,

Amy J. Goes to NY... to see Raising Up Rubies!

Haha... even as I type that title, I have to chuckle :)  Raising up Rubies... that's how you all know her, but to me she's just Jaime.  She is my dear friend, a gift of friendship to me from a loving Heavenly Father who knows all our quiet needs. 

A week ago today my hubs and I headed out, leaving Edmond, OK before the sun was even up to catch a plane headed to Rochester, NY.  We were going to meet friends... 

A week later, today, I have to start my week.  Get back to real life. One part of me feels refreshed and renewed after encouraging conversations had.  Another part feels inspired, ready to create all the things and ideas that flooded my mind as a result of spending time with my creative counter-part. And then there's the part of me that's blue, already missing the company of someone I've only met in person twice, but who feels like a sister.  But most of all, my heart is grateful.  I'm grateful as I feel the love of a compassionate God... the God who loves me (and Jaime) enough to orchestrate hundreds of little details and events to bring real and impacting friendship into existence. 

Would you like a peek into my trip?  I didn't even bring my real camera...  so I hope you enjoy a few blurry camera phone pics! Ha!

 Heading out early in the morning to catch our flight...

Our first evening together at Jaime's house... this pic took about 10 tries because we couldn't stop laughing.  #normalsizedheads

The hubs caught a pic of me trying to snatch a few pretties off Jaime's sewing desk... :)

We did a lot of shopping... Jaime introduced me to Savers.  #ohhowiloveyousavers

Jaime and her husband wouldn't stop bragging about their amazing grocery store, Wegmans, so we had to visit.  Jaime's a crazy shopper... she goes in circles.

 Stole a few alone moments with the hubs ;) ... this was a much needed break from our five kiddos!

One night we went on a double date together with our husbands!  That's another huge blessing of the trip... our husbands totally jived.  They had so many things in common... sarcasm and tolerance for their crazy wives being just a couple examples :)  Their appearance was not one of the things in common... Jaime's husband is a dark hairless formidable force and my hubs is apparently an Irish lumberjack ;)

On our double date we dined, hit Anthropologie, indulged in frozen yogurt and laughed at Jaime's unintentionally inappropriate comments ;)  ....oh and I snapped pics of the oblivious and lovely Jaime!

One afternoon we made this print together :)  ...a true melding of our shared style and creative mind!  It's a free download on her blog!  

It makes me so happy... I can't wait to find a special spot for it in my home as a reminder of what the Lord has done.  He has blessed me through my friendship with Jaime.  He allowed the hubs and I to get away, be refreshed and experience his goodness.

Speaking of reminders... I'm not short on mementos from my trip! (And this isn't even all of it :/ ) So much happy pretty thrifted goodness to remind me of my time in NY :) 

Now I just have to decide what to do with it all!

Blessings,

"Always Have Hope" Free Printable for the New Year!

Hi Friends :)
Happy New Year to you.

Can you tell I sound tired?  I am.
In fact, I'm always tired :)

I have five kids, I'm a pastor's wife, I'm in my thirties... I guess those are plenty of reasons to be tired.
But this past December I hit an all time low.  I just don't have the physical strength to keep up with my life!  And I'm talking just the basics! ... kids, hubs, food, and semi-clean house!  I have almost completely had to set aside my other ambitions... I long to be creative!  To decorate my house, make things for no real reason, try new recipes, draw, craft with my kids, and DESIGN!!

Why am I telling you this?

Well...  It's because I've become so desperate that I'm actually going to do the one thing that I never wanted to do.  {big dramatic pause}  Get healthy.
There I said it.  And you know it's the reverse implication that's the hard part to admit. I've been unhealthy.  oy.

So I'm ditching the Diet Coke... goodbye friend of 16+ years.
I'm ditching the candy and sweets...
And I'm actually going to eat things that work towards giving me energy instead of zapping it.

Yeah, yeah, I know.  It's nothing mind-blowing.  It's kind of a no brainer, but you have no idea how much I've depending on DC and sugar to get me through life!  ...kinda sad.

I've also started researching how to battle chronic fatigue, thyroid issues, and anxiety with nutrition and supplements.  I've got a lot to learn, but I feel that I'm on the right track.

You see... I've got a job to do.  I'm here to be the best wife possible to my man.  I'm here to raise these 5 kiddos in the knowledge and truth of Christ.  I'm here to testify to anyone within ear-shot of the Grace I've received from my Savior and spur others on in their relationship with him.  And I'm struggling to do my job these days.  So with His help, I've got to get this body of mine back in strong working order!!

So what are you tackling this New Year?
Do you have hope for the days ahead?
I feel like I do.

Well,  here on this poor neglected blog I always share a New Years printable.  I didn't have time or energy to make one :) HA!
So I'm pulling one from my Etsy store...  It will only be available for the month of January here on the blog.

I will always have hope.... for each new day, to tackle the daily mountains and find victory in Christ.
I will always have hope.... for this life.  God has a plan for me and wants to work all things together for the good of those who love him.
I will always have hope.... for what comes after this life.  My hope is ultimately eternal.  Nothing that happens in this world can ever separate me from the love of Christ and what he has in store for those who seek him.

Oh, God help me to cling to the hope I find in you.  Give me the strength to seek you daily.  Give me peace as I cling to you... no matter what happens today or in the year to come....  And help me to boldly proclaim the hope that is only found in your son, Jesus.  I give this year to you....

* simply click on the image and right click to save the image to your computer!  It is a high-resolution 8x10.png  ready to print.  As always this print is for personal use or to give as a gift.  File may not be distributed or used for profit of any kind. 

Blessings and Happy New Year!

Mothering in the Fog

It's amazing that I'm even sitting down to write this post... (we'll see if I get anywhere before something, rather some child, interrupts me...).  Life post-Lucy has been like living in a fog.

But let me back up...
While I was pregnant with Lucy, I didn't give much thought to how I would handle life with 5 kids.  To be honest, I didn't think I needed to.  Virgil, baby #4, had been a breeze.  I figured after three kids it was all about the same.  It's kinda chaotic,  kinda loud, you do alot of dishes and laundry and that's pretty much the gist of it.  I guess I was fairly cocky about it... I really thought it would be no big deal to add another baby to the mix. 

Then we had her... and she was (is) colicky.  And then you add Virgil's renewed determination to dominate the house and everyone in it... and you get a shocked mamma. 

It has been a real struggle for me.  All of my systems, routines, and rhythms have been jolted.  My house isn't clean,  I can hardly get a meal made,  and I feel like I never sleep.  Lucy is 8 weeks old today, and I would have expected that life be pretty much back to normal by now.  She still isn't sleeping through the night, she still cries a LOT,  and I'm still facing each day in sweat pants and crazy untamed hair.  Not to mention,  there's basically no time for anything recreational or creative... which is about to kill me!  I have piles of ideas in my head for crafts, decorating, and design projects.  I have a bazillion things I want to put up on the blog... but absolutely no time (or energy).

But don't misunderstand my tone... I'm actually not complaining... rather painting a picture of what life is for me these days.  A few weeks ago I would have been complaining, but I've been working on my perspective. 

Lately I've been mulling over what it really means to live by the Spirit... especially these difficult days as a tired mamma.  I haven't completely figured it out yet, but for me it involves a few intentional steps on my part.  I've had to come to a place where I can accept the fact that this is MY PORTION.  This isn't bad... it's not an accidental glitch in God's plan for my life.  Rather this is what God has given me for now.  I shouldn't be trying to change it or wish it away.  Throughout the night and throughout the day I breath this prayer...  "God do your work in me.  Let these days refine me and accomplish whatever you would have them accomplish.  Teach me to lean hard into you and to stop resisting this.  Take away my selfish self-serving heart and replace it with a heart for you, filled with your Spirit." 

The other part of it for me is finding a way to still be in God's word, pray, and even worship.  It's fragmented and feels insignificant at times, but I'm trying to sneak it in where I can.  My iphone has been such a wonderful tool!  Because I can hold it and manipulate it with one hand, I'm able to read my Bible app while I'm walking Lucy to sleep or nursing.  I've been using the Lifechurch.tv Bible app "You Version" which has reading plans on it.  awesome. 

During most nights, Lucy needs to be walked back to sleep after she nurses.  I'm naturally not a happy person during the night :)  I tend to feel very agitated or even angry.  So as I pace the floor in the living room, lately I try to use the time to breath somewhat foggy prayers for my children and my husband instead of letting negative thoughts fester.  I know they aren't my most eloquent prayers, but I know that the Lord hears them and blesses my determination to make the most of those sleepless nights.  And I've noticed what it does for my attitude the next morning...

Then there's Pandora on the computer...  Not a moment goes by that worship music isn't piped out of my Mac's speakers :)  Yesterday Lucy was screaming... she had been crying for a long time and I couldn't get her to stop.  My arms were so tired from carrying her and my nerves felt fried.  Finally I just laid her down on the floor in my office and sat down beside her.  Somewhere under the sound of her cries I heard a worship song coming from my computer.  I don't remember what song it was but the words were something about bowing down and singing "holy".   With frustrated tears coming to the surface, I just closed my eyes and took it all in...the crying, the exhaustion, and breathed "holy, you are holy...".   For me, that was perhaps one of my most genuine moments of worship I've ever had.  These days,  that's enough. 

I'm learning... it feels like a painfully slow process some days.  But hopefully when this stage passes I will be able to look back and see how God grew me through the tough days and nights.  I don't want to just survive these days, I want to allow God to use these days...

"But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble." Psalm 59:16  
(this was the verse of the day, a couple days back, on my phone... I discovered it in the middle of the night and took it to heart :) )

Hey!  What do you know?... I only had to stop once in the middle of typing this!  That's pretty good :)

Oh, and I wanted to tell you... randomly, this has nothing to do with any of this... I joined Instagram!  I can do it with one hand on my phone as well :)  happy. happy.  I added a button on the right sidebar... come find me!



Blessings,

Brokenness Here in Oklahoma

On Sunday night, all 7 of us took cover in our laundry room as a tornado came within two miles of our home.  As we hunkered down under mattresses and blankets,  I looked at each my kids' faces and wondered if the tornado would make it to our home...
It passed.  We were perfectly fine.

The next day the residents of Moore, OK, our neighbors to the South 20 miles, were in a similar position.  But for them it ended in devastation.

We mourn for those who lost loved ones.
We hurt for those who lost their homes.
We pray for all affected.

Click on the verse to for a high resolution version... Feel free to save, print,  and pass on to someone who needs some encouragement.

We have families from our church who live in Moore.  Thankfully they were spared from the physical destruction of the tornado.  For one of these families, our close friends, the tornado came within a half mile of their home, leaving his neighbors homes completely leveled.  Jeremy and this friend spent the day today in Moore, offering help wherever they could....

I ran into the garage door a bit today with our SUV...  I called Jeremy and told him while he was working in the rubble.  You know, he told me that I could have wrecked the car and he wouldn't have cared a bit.

Amazing how a tragedy like this puts life into perspective. 

Here are a couple shots that Jeremy took while out today...

This is a panorama shot... click on it to see it larger.  Jeremy was standing on a kitchen counter top looking over what used to be a neighborhood of hundreds of homes.  Nothing but rubble as far as the eye could see.

Blessings,

V is wearing PINK today.

So my little boy... my freshly turned 2 year old... is wearing pink footies currently. 

Let me explain. 
Virgil is my only boy, and I am continually grateful for him and all his boy-ness.  But he has been testing me... exasperating me since he was 4 months old.  I have never been so challenged as a mother as I have been with #4. 

Jump to lately...
I've been trying really hard to get up each morning before the kids to have a little quiet time with the Lord in his word.  This is a real struggle for me because I am anything but a morning person.  It takes every ounce of determination that I have to get up even 30 minutes before my kids.  Well, Virgil is the first to wake up... and over the past month he has been waking up in the middle of my quiet time.  But it has been okay because I just let him play in his room... then open the door and let him out when I'm done.

Another issue we are currently dealing with is V sneaking into the bathroom and playing in the toilet.  Whenever he manages to succeed... when his sisters accidentally leave the door open.... he often plays with the toilet cleaning brush, splashing clean or often dirty water all over the bathroom.  The other favorite of his is to literally try and climb into the toilet.  (take a deep breath, Amy...).

Enter added complication #1.
Poo. 
A couple weeks ago I opened his bedroom door after my devo time to find a boy covered in poo and a mural of poo on the back of his door. 
I did not handle this well.
In response I started cutting my quiet time short and running to his room at the first sound of him being up... but that made me mad!  I need that quiet time!  So...  I got smart and decided I was going to buy him a whole stack of footie p.j.s and safety pin them shut so that he couldn't take his diaper off.

Enter added complication #2.
Ability to open doors.
Well, yesterday... after falsely accusing my oldest daughter of leaving the bathroom door open... we discovered that V can now open doors.  My life is over. 

So last night Virgil got his last clean pair of footie p.j.s soaked to the knees with toilet water after opening the bathroom door and trying to climb into the toilet... for the third time that day. 

I'll be honest.  It was bedtime... I was very tired.  And I yelled alot.  I may have thrown a few things.  Then I stormed into the garage and dug girl footies out of the clothes tubbies.  Hot pink ones.  (Jeremy asked if I was trying to shame him into obedience... )  There was no way on this earth that I was going to follow that evening with a morning of poo on the walls because I didn't have clean footies to put him in.   So pink it is.

So this morning my son, blasts into our room before we even had a chance to get out of bed.  No morning quiet time...
I strung together some metal measuring cups (couldn't find a bell) and tied them to the bathroom door.  20 minutes into the morning V was already pushing my buttons... and now at 9:20, I already feel exhausted from dealing with him.  

Okay Amy, take a deep breath and remember.  This is your portion.  Today is not random... it is not an unlucky compilation of events.  God is in control and will work good out of EVERYTHING... if I submit to him and allow him to be glorified through the events of my messy life. 

My brain... soggy with hormones... wants to really freak out right now.  How in the world am I going to handle Virgil and a newborn???  If he can open doors, how will I keep him from climbing into her crib and tossing her out!?  I feel like I'm losing those last little ounces of control over things...

So I will choose to remember....

"Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary." Isaiah 40:31

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:4-7


Grace to you as you allow God to be glorified through your portion today!

Blessings,

Rest... on pretty sheets.

Sunday is a day of rest...

Lately I've been trying really hard to use it for that. 
I tend to be the type of person that is always chipping away at the to-do list, desperately trying to get to the end of it :)  In the past I've made the mistake of using Sunday afternoons to "catch-up", but it was causing me to burn out.  ...then it hit me... ah, yes, this day has been given to us for that very reason! ... to provide rest and allow time to focus on our first love without distractions. 

Now, I take a nap every Sunday afternoon.  My sweet husband, accommodates this even though he is always involved in the Sunday morning worship service at our church.  He knows I need it... he is so sweet :)

So I shut the door... it's quiet... and I rest. 

I bought "new" sheets awhile ago... they are lovely vintage ones that appear to have never been used!  oh, the joy :) 

So I lay in bed... in my calming quiet room, on my pretty sheets... and I thank God for a day of rest.  I ask him to renew my body, give me strength for the week ahead.  I thank him for that husband that takes care of me, and I thank him for those kids that I occasionally need to escape from :) 

It's easy to fall asleep... and when I wake I'm rested, better prepared to face the week ahead.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."  Matthew 11:28

Blessings on your week ahead :)

Submission

I feel like one of the themes of my life these days is submission.... God keeps calling my attention to it lately.  You see, I'm learning submission one piece of my life at a time.  Five years ago God taught me submission in my marriage, and it has brought me amazing freedom.  Two years ago God taught my husband and me submission with our plans in life on a larger scale... and it has brought us amazing peace.  But today I'm struggling with submission on a daily basis in my home.  How do I lay down my daily life?  How do I give up my control... of my kids, of my schedule, of my work, of my stress?

I was talking to God about it the other day....

"Lord there is so much turmoil in life right now.... so much to fight against and resist.  I'm always struggling.  I never feel at ease.  There are always concerns, stresses, trials.  I'm always exhausted, confused, losing ground.  I don't know what else to do but keep fighting.... because if I don't, I'll drown....  I'll drown.  I'll die.....  Oh.  I'm supposed to die?   So is that what this is all about?  Me dying?  Me dying so that I can be raised to life anew in you?  I think I understand... But Lord, I don't know how to stop striving.  I don't know how to just stop kicking and let myself sink down....down into the calm quiet dark of you.  It scares me.  I don't know what's down there.  How do I know that you will bring me back to life in you?  Trust... I know.  But it's so hard.  Help me Lord.  Help me to trust you enough to stop kicking and fighting life.... Teach me to trust you, Lord... help me to submit."

I think I'm beginning to understand what I need to do...  now just to do it.
Definitely something to contemplate... have some more conversations with God about... as I go into this meaningful weekend.

Blessings to you this Easter season,