Kinda Stinky.

Another bug recently hit our family.  This time around it's just a fever and headache that lingers a few days. Sickness is one of those strangely familiar unwelcome guests that just keeps letting himself in despite your insults and attempts to keep him out!

Over the past 13 years, every winter I have braced myself for the bugs that will inevitably come our way.  Mothering is full of all kinds of amazing experiences, but comforting and caring for a sick little person is rarely one of them. Yes, having their warm little bodies curl up to you is a perk...but I'm talking about cleaning puke out from between the slats of a crib.  Scrubbing the carpet while gagging.  Peeling off vomit covered clothes that stick to you and smear across your face as your trying to release yourself from them.  Never sleeping soundly because you're hyper sensitive to every sound, wondering if what you just heard is a crying kid or throw up hitting the tile in the hall way.  And then multiply it all with 2, 3, or 4 kids!

So the past few days as my kids have piled up on the couch, sleeping and watching TV, I've felt strangely grateful.  At one point, all five kids were asleep.  Can you imagine!?

Later Alice, my 13 year old, came up to me and apologized that I had to deal with so many sick kids.  Such a sweetheart :)  I chuckled and said that it really wasn't a big deal.  She looked at me kinda funny and asked what I meant.  I smiled and went into story telling mode...

We really have come a long way as a family!

But I'm still human and I need to air one complaint.

So about day three of the kiddos being sick,  Jeremy and I noticed something.  Actually I noticed my husband walk into the living room, get a puckered squinty look on his face, double over, and exclaim, "What is that smell!?"  I walked over and was smacked in the face with the same insulting aroma.   So of course, as any good mom would do, I went around sniffing everybody and everything like some crazed bloodhound.   My investigation was inconclusive, which only served to increase my agitation. So again, like a good mom, I instructed all five of my sweaty, dirty, stinky kids to go change their clothes and brush their teeth.  And then I proceeded to open all the windows.

So gross.

Babies don't stink.  Well... not like that at least.  What happened to all my squishy babies who smelled like baby soap, pampers, and milk!?  Oh, wait, I know... they grew up and got stinky.  haha.

Okay, I feel better now.  I just had to get that off my chest.  :)

So minus the stench, it has gotten a whole lot easier!  Be encouraged all you mamas in the trenches!  Your day is coming when you won't mind your whole house being overtaken by a fever and you might even take a few pictures :)

A complicated and dense character...

When I was a little girl, maybe 6 or 7, my grandmother introduced me to personality tests.  I remember her sitting with one leg crossed over the other on her leather couch, adjusting her tortoise shell reading glasses on her nose as she read the questions aloud to me.  "Which do you think you are, Amy dear?"

According to Myers Briggs I'm an INFJ. A few months ago I read an article describing a few odd things about this personality type.  Apparently, I'm very good at reading others and am very empathetic to their feelings....BUT very out of touch with my own feelings.  ( Insert the laughing/crying emoticon here.)

Great.  Lovely.

The article went on to explain how INFJs need to audibly/externally hear their own thoughts in order to make sense of them.  They will talk in a disjointed random manner, stumbling around, until upon hearing all the information they're able to put it together and make sense of it all.  This just cracks me up.  Seriously this makes me sound like a very complicated and somewhat dense character!  But sadly, I can't argue.  It's true... Even the fact that it took me reading an article about myself in order to know that fact about myself, confirms that it's true.  So tragic.

Then today, for some random reason, I decided to pull up "my old blog", haha.  I got lost reading through old posts.  I  smiled, laughed, and teared up a little remembering all of the moments.  And it occurred to me that during those years that I posted frequently, writing was one of the main ways I processed life.  It was in the task of sorting out my words, typing those sentences, that I sorted out life.  

I don't have time to write blog posts.  I'll be honest, my personality is also know for getting very bogged down by the daily tasks of life... getting overwhelmed and frustrated by too many irons in the fire.  Yet, I feel like there are some legitimate benefits to this exercise.  Plus I always enjoyed the photography as a creative outlet too, which has fallen by the wayside for the most part as well.

So I think I'll try.

But things are very different now... compared to 6-8 years ago when I was fully engaged here.  I'm not sure I know what to write about anymore.  Babies turned into actual people (who can read the things your write about them- gulp)... creative outlets gave way to illustrating to build a business... and the fun of decorating yielded to misleadingly perfect little squares of pretty things on Instagram.   Life seems very different.

Yet so much is the same.  I'm still a mama struggling to live a life of faith.  I'm still seeking Christ and growing in all the messiness of life.  I still have stories to tell.

So we shall see what this odd INFJ personality comes up with over the next months.  I greatly appreciate the few that wander over to this blog and listen to my ramblings.  Apparently I need you more than I realized :)