A complicated and dense character...

When I was a little girl, maybe 6 or 7, my grandmother introduced me to personality tests.  I remember her sitting with one leg crossed over the other on her leather couch, adjusting her tortoise shell reading glasses on her nose as she read the questions aloud to me.  "Which do you think you are, Amy dear?"

According to Myers Briggs I'm an INFJ. A few months ago I read an article describing a few odd things about this personality type.  Apparently, I'm very good at reading others and am very empathetic to their feelings....BUT very out of touch with my own feelings.  ( Insert the laughing/crying emoticon here.)

Great.  Lovely.

The article went on to explain how INFJs need to audibly/externally hear their own thoughts in order to make sense of them.  They will talk in a disjointed random manner, stumbling around, until upon hearing all the information they're able to put it together and make sense of it all.  This just cracks me up.  Seriously this makes me sound like a very complicated and somewhat dense character!  But sadly, I can't argue.  It's true... Even the fact that it took me reading an article about myself in order to know that fact about myself, confirms that it's true.  So tragic.

Then today, for some random reason, I decided to pull up "my old blog", haha.  I got lost reading through old posts.  I  smiled, laughed, and teared up a little remembering all of the moments.  And it occurred to me that during those years that I posted frequently, writing was one of the main ways I processed life.  It was in the task of sorting out my words, typing those sentences, that I sorted out life.  

I don't have time to write blog posts.  I'll be honest, my personality is also know for getting very bogged down by the daily tasks of life... getting overwhelmed and frustrated by too many irons in the fire.  Yet, I feel like there are some legitimate benefits to this exercise.  Plus I always enjoyed the photography as a creative outlet too, which has fallen by the wayside for the most part as well.

So I think I'll try.

But things are very different now... compared to 6-8 years ago when I was fully engaged here.  I'm not sure I know what to write about anymore.  Babies turned into actual people (who can read the things your write about them- gulp)... creative outlets gave way to illustrating to build a business... and the fun of decorating yielded to misleadingly perfect little squares of pretty things on Instagram.   Life seems very different.

Yet so much is the same.  I'm still a mama struggling to live a life of faith.  I'm still seeking Christ and growing in all the messiness of life.  I still have stories to tell.

So we shall see what this odd INFJ personality comes up with over the next months.  I greatly appreciate the few that wander over to this blog and listen to my ramblings.  Apparently I need you more than I realized :)